How to Write an Online Personal Ad to Attract a Great Match

Online personal ads are a great way to meet a lot of interesting people quickly. Personal ads are also a great way to get over a fear many singles struggle with - that there are not enough available singles of the opposite sex out there. Once you get into the online personal ad game and connect with hundreds of other singles looking for a relationship, that fear disappears.

It's easy enough to write an ad that will get people to either contact you or respond to your hello. In fact, this is so easy that you could end up with way too many responses and way too many people who are not suited for you.

If what you really want is to get connected with people who are well suited for you, with whom you are a great match, then consider the following tips for writing an online personal ad.

  1. Know what qualities you are looking for in a partner and ask for them in your ad.
    Think about what is really important to you in a partner. These are the same qualities you find really important in friends.

  2. Do not list qualities you do not want in a partner.
    Ads listing unwelcome qualities sound negative and often angry and turn people off. You can screen people for qualities you do not want once you speak to or correspond with them.

  3. Know what qualities you bring to the relationship and list them in your ad.
    Think about what makes you, you. These are the same qualities your friends find appealing about you.

  4. Mention any hobby, passion or activity that occupies a large amount of your time.
    If there is something you either love to do or spend a lot of time doing, mention it in a description of yourself. It is obviously important to you and part of what defines who you are.

  5. Be honest about who you are, and what you want and do not play games.
    If you are afraid to write an ad that is too personal for fear of attracting no one, see if you can try it anyway. The more honest you are, the more likely you are to attract whom you actually want.

  6. Refrain from making your ad to sexual, unless you are looking for sexual liaisons only.
    If you are looking for a relationship and not just sex, leave the sex out and tone down the physical descriptions in your ad. Otherwise you will be attracting people who are more interested in sex than in a relationship.

  7. Know what kind of a relationship you want and list some of the highlights in your ad.
    Whether you want a relationship with lots of laughter and fun, or one where deep conversations last into the night, etc., put some of this in your ad.

  8. Write the ad in your conversational style.
    Refrain from using dazzling words or a lighthearted tone, unless that is your natural inclination. Write the ad in a style that most naturally resembles your spoken word, not in a style in which you think you should write.

  9. Get your closest friends to read your ad to determine whether it describes you and the relationship/partner you are looking for.
    Our friends often know us better than we know ourselves - trust their opinion if they tell you to rewrite your ad. You are more likely to end up attracting people you feel good dating.

  10. Go slow when people show interest.
    When someone answers your ad and sounds like the kind of person you are looking for, still take time to get to know him or her. You don't really know someone until you spend a significant amount of time together in person.

Your Relationship Coach,
Rinatta Paries

"(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

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Voice and video chat sites are recommended.