Ten Things You Never Knew About
Relationships
When you finally attract and build a healthy relationship,
a whole new world of realizations opens up to you. You finally understand
how relationships work and what deep, true love really looks like.
Today I'll share ten things you will realize once you
are in a healthy relationship.
- You did not know your soul mate right away.
When you met you soul mate, you did not know him or her by fanfare and the
rush of hormones. You only knew him or her by a very gentle tug on your
heart.
- Relationships rarely look like romantic movies
or books.
Imaginary people fall in love quickly and live happily ever after. Real
people fall into real love slowly and live fully ever after. It took you
about 6 to 9 months to appreciate your partner enough to think about falling
in love with him or her.
- It takes years to really get to know someone.
The gift of being human is our complexity. Is it possible to know someone
in a week, a month, a few dates? Can you reveal all of your complexity in
that short amount of time? How long does it take someone to truly know you?
It took you years to truly get to know your partner.
- Great relationships are completely worth the
effort.
There is nothing like being in a great relationship. There is nothing like
being seen and known by the one you love, and seeing and loving back. You
are grateful you have this gift, even though it took a lot of work to get
here.
- In spite of lots of bad relationships, a great
relationship is possible.
It doesn't matter if you have been "unlucky in love." All that matters is
that you have taken the steps necessary to build a great relationship. These
were different steps than the ones you have taken in the past. If you had
to do this again, you would know exactly what to do.
- A relationship is like a living being; it needs
love, caring, space, etc.
People tend to either ignore or smother relationships. In the first case
they ignore their partner, thinking that a relationship, once established,
will always be there. Or in the other extreme, they spend every moment with
their partner, give, and expect undivided attention. If you had a pet, how
would it survive under such conditions?
But you know better, you give your relationship the time, attention,
and space it needs.
- Your relationship doesn't have to be like your
parents'.
Regardless of the models and worldview of the previous generations, your
life still belongs to you. You have chosen how you do your relationships,
instead of blindly doing or thinking something just because it comes naturally.
- You have a great relationship because you don't
need one.
Your life is wonderful and having a relationship is not its focus. This
is why you attracted the right mate. You know that heaving a great life
is not at all the same as forcing yourself not to think about relationships
or shutting down out of disappointment.
- There is no such thing as boredom in a relationship.
There may be anger, resentment, shut down, but never boredom. How can you
get bored with your partner when your needs are being met, when you have
great communication, when you feel loved and love back? Could you ever be
bored with that? What people think of as boredom is actually the accumulated
weight of unspoken resentments and anger squeezing the life out a relationship.
- Good sex does not mean a good relationship.
Looking back, you know sex is not how you connected with you partner. The
two of you have created a romantic relationship you enjoy. And from that,
you have created a sex life you enjoy. Now you know that when you meet someone,
you need to get to know them first and not audition them for a sex partner.
Your Relationship Coach,
Rinatta Paries
"(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate?
Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours
to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills
and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit
www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free
weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!" |